"His voice had the calm seriousness of an explosives expert relaying instructions for dismantling a bomb."
LOL forever.
Also, over the summer I nearly developed an ulcer trying to make an informed purchase of a new vacuum. I fell down multiple Reddit rabbit holes where the consensus is, overwhelmingly, they just don't make 'em like they used to. The solution? Go to a vacuum repair shop. Find the oldest, heaviest piece of equipment. Make sure it's bagged! Make sure it has, as you noted, a GD cord! Be prepared to spend upwards of $1000. At this point, I dug myself out of the hole and bought a more cost-effective Shark, ignoring Reddit experts' claims that any positive reviews of this garbage are incentivized by Big Vacuum. It will likely die in two years. But right now, our house is free of dog hair.
My god, I had no idea about the difficulties of vacuum shopping. I ended up getting a beast of a thing that looks like it should clean convention centers, but it’s corded and it works… for now
As always, this is so funny and so well written. You’re a very gifted writer. You gotta get this to more people. Please submit to the OB Rag. email is obragblog@gmail.com
Could also generate some more donation for your school needs.
"His voice had the calm seriousness of an explosives expert relaying instructions for dismantling a bomb."
LOL forever.
Also, over the summer I nearly developed an ulcer trying to make an informed purchase of a new vacuum. I fell down multiple Reddit rabbit holes where the consensus is, overwhelmingly, they just don't make 'em like they used to. The solution? Go to a vacuum repair shop. Find the oldest, heaviest piece of equipment. Make sure it's bagged! Make sure it has, as you noted, a GD cord! Be prepared to spend upwards of $1000. At this point, I dug myself out of the hole and bought a more cost-effective Shark, ignoring Reddit experts' claims that any positive reviews of this garbage are incentivized by Big Vacuum. It will likely die in two years. But right now, our house is free of dog hair.
Good luck with your next vacuum. I hope it SUCKS!
My god, I had no idea about the difficulties of vacuum shopping. I ended up getting a beast of a thing that looks like it should clean convention centers, but it’s corded and it works… for now
This is the type of life lesson you should be teaching your students. Prepare them for the mundane world of adulting!
As always, this is so funny and so well written. You’re a very gifted writer. You gotta get this to more people. Please submit to the OB Rag. email is obragblog@gmail.com
Could also generate some more donation for your school needs.
Thanks for the kind words, Paul! And also for the recommendation to submit. I’m on it!