Trolling, as a treat

Finding some much-needed joy in the CA State Assembly's treatment of Carl DeMaio

In the video, California Assemblymember Carl DeMaio looks very mad.

He waves a stack of paper in the air—presumably a printed out copy of House Resolution 43 (HR-43 if you’re nasty). He holds it high, like a man from the ‘50s brandishing a comic book while espousing its evil effects on youth.

“This resolution doesn’t affirm, value or respect the LGBT community... what this resolution does is endorse very controversial and extremist policy positions, which is very—” he pauses for effect here. “Unique.”

CA Assembly Speaker Josh Lowenthal cuts in. “Mr. DeMaio, just a moment please,” he says, and asks the clerk to hold DeMaio’s speaking time. “Mr. Juan Carrillo, I believe it is your birthday today. Members, will you join me in wishing Mr. Carrillo a very happy birthday.”

There’s an uproar in the audience. People cheer. The camera cuts to Assemblymember Carrillo wearing novelty glasses.

“Wishing you very many happy returns, Mr. Carillo. Enjoy your day,” Lowenthal says. “Mr. DeMaio, you may continue.”

It’s an amazing sequence. Lowenthal’s deadpan delivery, his thousand-yard dead-eye stare before ceding time back to DeMaio, Carrillo’s fucking birthday glasses—just a masterclass in comedy.

“So where we left off...” DeMaio jumps back in, red in the face, eyebrows arched like a comic book villain.

For those of us who aren’t familiar with house bills, legislations, or resolutions, it’s a little confusing as to why DeMaio’s so mad. What could be so offensive in those papers in his hand?

But then he gets to it: “...Extremist views in this resolution, which includes ending girls sports, the integrity of girls sports...”

Ah, there it is. “Girls sports.” The transphobe’s dog whistle. A Very Important Issue for thousands who’ve likely never been to a girls or women’s sports game, and a nice little anti-trans scapegoat for people who’re too cowardly to admit it explicitly.

If it’s not clear, DeMaio sucks. Always has. He’s been a thorn in the side of San Diego politics for decades. He’s a grifter without shame. I could go on. How he managed to become elected to the state assembly after a decade of political (and hilarious) failures is indicative of how stupid our timeline is.

It also should be noted that the resolution he’s yelling about is not a law, more of a statement of decorum regarding how the CA State Assembly conducts business. You can read the resolution here, which is only extreme or controversial unless you think respecting trans people is extreme. (Also, DeMaio continuously cites the “LGBT community” for agreeing with him, apparently forgetting what the T stands for). The fact that DeMaio spends so much energy and vitriol on this is a testament to his inane priorities. The dude’s only been in the assembly for six months and you can already feel the sheer exhaustion from his colleagues.

But back to the clip.

Now, DeMaio’s getting fired up. He’s slashing the air. He shows everyone the papers again.

“Mr. DeMaio,” Lowenthal interjects again. “Just a moment.”

“We’re gonna have another birth—?”

“Excuse me,” Lowenthal says, shutting him up. “Members, you’ll have to forgive me, but on Thursday last week, I forgot it was Damon Connolly’s birthday.”

Just incredible. SNL couldn’t have done it better.

And then a few minutes later, they do it again. Three interruptions during DeMaio’s speech, all for birthdays.

This video, my friends, has been giving me life for many days. It’s a reminder that beauty can still exist in the world. Sure, this is about the extent that Democrats will go to #resist the encroaching fascism (whoops, almost forgot about wearing pink), but if we know anything about Republicans, it’s this kind of shit that gets to them. In fact, I wouldn’t have found this clip if it weren’t for DeMaio’s Reform California emailing me about it, accusing the assembly of “bullying” DeMaio.

Imagine a man whose main talking point is ripping joy away from trans kids accusing anyone of bullying.

At the risk of reading too much into it, I also think this clip shows the power of joy in the face of oppression. Interrupting an anti-trans rant to celebrate birthdays is a powerful display. Part of what makes our times so miserable is the rampant catastrophizing that bombards us every day. “The world is on fire...” might as well be an English language prefix now. And I’m not saying our current timeline is not bad—it is, indeed, quite bad—but concern and joy don’t have to be mutually exclusive. Joy should not feel like a privilege.

A few weeks ago, I attended the No King’s rally with a sign that read “This is nothing compared to the party we’ll have when you die.” The day after, so I decided to share the pic on Reddit. It quickly went to the top of r/sandiegan and then to the front page of Reddit. It’s now been seen by more than 3.5 million people.

The reason I think it spread so far is that it’s a message of joy. Or, at least that’s what I intended. Once MAGA found it, they accused me of wishing death upon the president (“the tolerant left” was an oft-repeated comment)—a predictable and intellectually dishonest interpretation from less-than-critical thinkers. The point is: The president will die, as we all do. And when that happens, many will rejoice. Many many many. I mean, in the history of the United States, has there ever been a rally the size of No Kings against a single human being? Has there been anyone in history that has so thoroughly sucked the joy from everyday living like him?

So we find hope and joy where we can. Or in the words of the dead-eyed, fed-up-with-this-shit Assembly Speaker: “Enjoy your day.”