Teaching journal 2/5-2/8

Experiencing karma for believing, briefly, that teaching is easy

Recap: I’m a teacher in San Diego. I teach English Language Development (ELD, the new term for ESL) to 9-12 grade newcomers to the country. On January 3, I was informed that my position would be eliminated next year. This journal is a chronicle of my current experience before it ends. Hope you enjoy. 

Monday, February 5, 2024

Another stormy day. The Cheater came today wearing a new sweatsuit—pristine white with a little bit of blue. Hell of a day to wear something so white, like wearing a wedding dress in the middle of a monsoon. Mr. P overheard The Cheater trying to use his new sweatsuit as a flex on on a another girl, and she did not give a shit.

Started both periods with another Jamboard that asked students to identify the “who, what, where, when, why” of a picture. Also introduced the words “will” and “might” to help them describe what may happen next. This is pretty advanced for their English levels—and they don’t normally learn it for another year or two—but there are questions on the ELPAC about future tense, and it doesn’t hurt to expose them to what they’ll see.  

The Jamboard had three pictures that students had to describe. One picture had a group of divers swimming with sharks, another showed cops chasing a loose pig down the alley, and the last picture showed a family getting attacked by a flock of pigeons. I loved seeing a student’s reaction when they see an onslaught of murderous birds. 

In first period, one of the Haitian boys—who I’m going to call Fashion Guy because I really like his shirts—asked me for help with his work while I was sitting in the vicinity of The Cheater. Fashion Guy’s not the best student, but when a lot of his cohort moved up to the next level of ELD this semester, I think it lit a fire under his ass and now he’s working hard to become the top student. 

When I’m helping students with Jamboards, I often point somewhere in the picture and ask “What is happening here?” So while I was helping Fashion Guy, The Cheater was just running his mouth, and Fashion Guy turned to The Cheater and said, “Hey [student name], what is happening here?” very sternly, aggressively. 

The Cheater looked like he had just been slapped. The two stared at each other for a moment, and then The Cheater said, “I don’t know.”

For a moment, I thought they were going to throw down, but then Fashion Guy turned back to me.

I also introduced some new vocabulary today, and one of the words was “belief.” The worksheet/graphic organizer asked students to draw a picture of a belief that a young child might have. I gave the example of Santa Claus and one girl in the back said, “Santa is just a belief?” and for a brief moment I thought I might’ve ruined this kid’s childhood, but then she smiled. Love to get owned by teens.

Also, Quizizz Girl was back today after being absent pretty much all of last week. Once it started raining hard, she got very excited and started singing a song about how there would be no PE. Good to have her back.

I don’t know if this is worth noting here, but I wore a tucked-in shirt today. One thing I like about this job is there’s really no dress code, and I mostly dress like a slob, but I like dressing up every now and then.

(Also, look at me thinking a tucked-in shirt is “dressed up”)

There’s a little power in looking like a fucking dork. I think it shows kids that you’re not trying too hard to impress them, or maybe that you’re so confident as a teacher that you don’t care how you look. And I think it helps put me more in the role of being a teacher, as if it’s a costume. 

Anyway, [Jerry Seinfeld voice], what’s the deal with tucked-in shirts?

Tuesday, February 6, 2024

Ugh. 

Pretty sure I’m experiencing some karma for getting all cocky last week for thinking that I was a good teacher. Today was one of those days where I just ended the lesson 20 minutes before class ended because nobody was paying attention. I was getting a headache from having to tell so many kids to sit down and stop talking. 

At one point, one of the good students came up and tried to show me how to tap Mr. P’s bell to get everyone’s attention. I was like, “Thank you, I know how a bell works.”

I warned the class that they were going to have a new seating chart tomorrow. This class is special—everyone is so kindhearted and, for the most part, engaged—but there needs to be more structure. I know it’s super frustrating for the kids who want to learn to have to sit through so much classroom management. In those kinds of scenarios, even the “good” kids just start seeing class as inconsequential, and then they will become disruptive in their own ways. 

So, we’ll try the new seating chart tomorrow. I really hate seating charts because I feel like allowing his students to sit where they want to sit gives them some agency in a system that doesn’t really afford them a lot of agency, but also, like, they need to stfu sometimes.

But part of the chaos was my fault. In the middle of the period, I brought out a big back of snacks—provided by the school—and just shouted, “Everybody, I got snacks!” It was like pouring blood in the water. Never seen the kids move so fast. After that, of course they’re going to have trouble focusing. 

Yeah, third period was a rough time.

We have the capability to text parents through PowerSchool, and it’s amazing because it will translate the text into the language that the parents have picked in their profile. After third period, I texted a Haitian girl’s parents to tell them about how I have to constantly remind their student to return to her seat. We’ll see how that goes.

During my fourth period prep, I just needed to be somewhere quiet, so I went back to my classroom and looked at a teacher subreddit. Read about a lot of horrible teaching experiences, and I thought, “well, at least I don’t have as bad as them.” Made me feel better.

Also, today as I was entering the elevator, one of the assistant associate principals was exiting and he leaned in close and whispered, “Bradford your fly is down.”

Karma.

Wednesday, February 7, 2024

Rained again today. Any sort of deviation from the usual environment will make kids go wild. Happens on a full moon, too. 

Today was another day where only seven or eight kids showed up to my first period. About half the class. 

Began with a Quizizz game on conjunctions, which I created with the new AI function. Lot of people are down on AI but it has been so incredibly useful as a teacher. I can just say, “Create a 15-question quiz that tests students on the conjunctions “and”, “but”, and “or” and voila. 

We read a new text today called “Behind the Veil,” a short essay about the author’s experience going on a school trip with an Muslim girl, and the whole thing was about realizing he and the Muslim girl weren’t so different after all.

Any narrative like this is gonna be very challenging for an emerging English learner, but I think the students like learning language through narratives more than rote grammar and vocabulary exercises. We also have great color printers at work, so when we read stories from the textbook, I copy the pages and give each student a color copy that they can annotate and mark up. Even if students are not into the story, at least they get nice high-gloss images to look at.  

I chickened out and didn’t give the new seating assignment, but the girl whose parents I texted wouldn’t look me in the eye today. Felt bad for a little bit, but then I remembered how disruptive she’d been over the past few days, and was like, “let her feel bad for a day.”

Also today, The Cheater and his little friend sat in the front row and were so engaged that I thought they were putting me on. “Are you possessed by a demon?” I wanted to ask. “Are you fucking with me??” 

It weirded me out. But, I mean, also, good for them.

Thursday, February 8, 2024

I made a worksheet for the “Behind the Veil”, which was probably a little advanced for a lot of the kids. But I wanted to see them struggle a little bit. 

As I was helping students who had been absent the day prior, The Cheater and his little friend sped through the worksheet, and kept bothering me to check their work while I was helping the other kids. Once they finished, they started wrestling and I was like, please for the love of god, let me just be able to turn my back for a minute without guys falling apart. With freshman boys, they always want to wrestle.

In both classes, I told the students that one of their teachers had just received awful news. A death in the family. 

I wasn’t even finished explaining, when one girl in third period raised her hand and asked if they could make cards for the teacher. I was so touched by this gesture that I almost started to cry. 

I  abandoned my lesson, brought out the art supplies and every single kid got to work. It was the most focused and reverent class I’ve ever had. It gave me faith in humankind. 

At the end of class, Quizizz Girl told me it was her last day at school—she had aged out of high school and was going to continue at the adult school nearby. It bummed me out, but it’s not the first time this has happened. Refugee students often have unstable living situations, and sometimes they’ll just be moved or need to move very suddenly. That doesn’t sound like the case for Quizizz Girl, but it’s never fun to say goodbye to a student. 

Friday, February 9, 2024

No entry today because I was at a writer conference in Kansas City, and staying in the most cursed AirBnb I’ve ever stayed in. Stay tuned.